Exclusive: Study Finds That Pee Pee Poo Poo May Actually Be the Key to World Peace

Jun 5, 2023, 9:56 PM

Scientists have made a groundbreaking discovery that could change the course of history as we know it. In a recent study, researchers found that the seemingly childish act of saying "pee pee poo poo" can actually release endorphins in the brain and promote feelings of joy and relaxation. Yes, you read that right – the key to world peace may just be in our own diapers!

The study, conducted over a period of five years, involved thousands of participants from all over the globe. Each subject was asked to say "pee pee poo poo" three times a day for a month, while researchers tracked their brain activity and mood. The results were astonishing.

According to the lead researcher, Dr. Jane Smith, "We found that saying 'pee pee poo poo' can trigger the release of endorphins in the brain, which are known to promote positive feelings and reduce stress. Participants who took part in our study reported feeling more relaxed, happy, and at peace with themselves and others."

But what does this mean for the world at large? Could the simple act of saying "pee pee poo poo" really be the key to ending all conflicts and achieving global harmony? Our investigative team decided to dig deeper.

We reached out to world leaders and politicians to get their take on the matter. To our surprise, many of them were willing to participate in our experiment and try saying "pee pee poo poo" themselves. And the results were astounding.

Russian President Vladimir Putin, known for his tough demeanor and aggressive foreign policy, reported feeling "like a new man" after saying "pee pee poo poo" for the first time. "I never realized how tense I was until I said those magical words," he told us. "Now I am more relaxed, more open-minded, and more willing to listen to the opinions of others."

Even North Korean dictator Kim Jong-un, who is known for his erratic behavior and hostile rhetoric, was willing to give it a try. "At first, I was skeptical," he admitted. "But after saying 'pee pee poo poo' three times, I felt a sense of calm that I have never experienced before. Perhaps this could be the first step towards peace between our nations."

But not everyone was convinced. U.S. President Joe Biden, who has been a vocal critic of Putin and Kim, refused to participate in our experiment. "I don't think saying 'pee pee poo poo' is going to solve the world's problems," he said. "We need real solutions, not childish games."

Despite this skepticism, our research suggests that there may be something to this theory after all. Could it be that the simple act of saying "pee pee poo poo" is the key to unlocking the world's potential for peace and harmony? Only time will tell.

In the meantime, we encourage all of our readers to give it a try. Say "pee pee poo poo" three times a day for a month, and see how it makes you feel. Who knows, you might just be surprised at the results.

This is AI generated satire and is not intended to be taken seriously.